Unfortunately, men cuss (you heard it here first). We break a window in our heavenly palaces with each utterance, but there you have it. Cooking is no different from rebuilding a carburetor in that manner. You scrape your knuckles with a crescent wrench or a chef's knife and, well, it hurts!
Recently, my son and I had a talk about cussing. In watching the movie "Get Smart," he noted that the character of "the chief" had a moment of existential terror and related that his thoughts went something like this: "Holy 'Beep!' Holy 'Beep!' I was almost hit in the head with a swordfish!" Well, that's my son's version of the dialogue anyway and his rendition is far funnier than anything on the screen.
I told him that maybe we can cut people some slack when they stub their toes or slice their knuckles. But, I also pointed out that there is another genre of cussing that seems to me to be the product of a lazy mind and we shouldn't let our minds get lazy. So, the other day he was expressing his dissatisfaction with something and he said "Duhbunketah!" Not wanting to cultivate a lazy mind, he decided that he would make up a word on the spot to express any dissappointment. My goal is to adopt his philosophy in the kitchen.
Bang my head on an open cabinet? Duhbunketah!
Slice off a finger with the chef's knife? Duhbunketah!
Out of garlic? Holy Beep!